1. Give to yourself.
Be honest. Have you been giving to something else (or someone else) more than you’ve been giving to yourself? Try to begin your day with two things. First, create a list of the 1-2 accomplishments that will matter to you. Next, try to begin your day by giving to yourself in a small way. Lately I’ve been drinking hot water with fresh lemon. That’s a small gesture, but I feel like I’m honoring myself. How can you begin your day by honoring yourself?
2. Speak up.
Check in. Is there an area of your life where you aren’t feeling heard or valued? Or where you don’t feel respected? If yes, what is your truth? What do you need to say?
3. Don’t be so nice!
Sometimes we need a little nudge to set a boundary in our lives. Maybe it’s work-related or some area of your personal life. When we get off center, we are usually out of balance. It’s challenging to set boundaries if we aren’t used to doing it. Even if this is a new way of thinking or a new behavior, you can do it. You don’t have to be agreeable. Don’t say YES to every request. “I wish I could help you. You know I’ve helped you in the past. But this time, I just can’t. This time I have to say no.”
4. Offload
Is there anyone else who could help you carry the load? Get help. Try to ask more questions of other people. “Would you be willing to…” Or if you ask a lot of questions, make more statements. Change things up. “I need some help. I want to do a high quality job on this project, but I’m too overwhelmed right now. I can’t get it all done. I need your help in determining what two things matter most. I don’t want to let you down, but I can’t do everything you’ve asked me to do.”
5. Have more FUN
Make effort to do something fun. Set up a play date with a friend. Go to a movie. Jump on your bike and ride. Take a yoga class. Or maybe you need to slow down. Find a comfortable place, sit back, and do nothing for 5 minutes. Relax as you look through a magazine. Sit on a park bench and watch people. Take yourself out for a cup of tea. Walk slowly around a park. The goal in this step is do the opposite of whatever you were doing to get off center. Sometimes that’s obvious, but other times it sneaks up on you a little bit at a time and before you know it you’re stressed, overwhelmed, or not happy. Stay on top of things before they get out of control. Or recognize they are out of control and get back on track.
6. Check in
Make a commitment to yourself for four weeks. Every Friday do a quick progress check with yourself. On a scale of 1-10, where’s your level or happiness or peace of mind? Have you made positive movement? Are you coming back to who you really are? Keep at it. You’ll find yourself again. – Chris Melching